On finding a book of poems written by Cesca in '92-'93

This is priceless and humiliating. Upon returning to my parent's house I found the self-bound laminated book of pomes written by my 5th grade self in '92-'93. The book is titled "These are my feelings", and on the cover I drew the earth as a heart instead of a globe. I share these extra embarrassing details because it's too funny not to. So here are the three haikus I included in that precious volume.

I dream of dragons
so high in the blue heavens
that fight with no power

they started from seeds
now they're grown up and they're trees
they will never die

and my favorite...... (even though I just realized that I didn´t even stick to 5/7/5)

It's like a jail here
but it's not a crime cell
It's only about love

On the really vivid dream I had last night

Dressed in white, oh my.
What a dream I had last night.
Wedding bells did ring

As I am sitting home alone on my couch writing my paper

So few posts this week,
Please, guys, help me, won't you? Need
to procrastinate

On the occasion of writing my first research paper in 3 years

Love the Internet
J-Stor, you're the bomb. Research.
Never leave my couch.

Irony: Master's
in Library Science, but
I hate libraries.

Pajamas, blankets
Writing is better this way.
No fluorescent light.

But one thing is changed:
No laptop farm. Sad.
Chapin, I miss you!

Cesca's tour

Cesca, in awe, saw all
AC taping, lights galore
Whoops! Locked in a set!

On the occasion of Cesca arriving to pick up my house keys

Cesca's coming here
Got permission to give tour
Will hit overload.

On this particular jaunt to New York

Replying from bus
Nothing fun, odd to report
Will be there by three

Em I do promise
No parties or mess I'll make
Keys are safe with me

One more for the road
Three haikus to match dear Em
But not about much

On the occasion of Cesca's overnight visit

Random Thursday night
Cesca on Christopher Street
Reading this on bus?

Picking up my keys
Better not throw a party
I tidied for you!

List of sanctioned things:
Naps, TV, Email, wii. Dont:
get locked out please. Thanks

On staying late & trying to be efficient

I'm working til ten
Try to get my review done
My eyes quit at six

On the occasion of the news never stopping

Home alone 'til two
Working late. Do homework? No.
Gonna play some wii

My respiratory system is (hic!) rebelling!

Hiccups! They won't stop!
Research? (hic) reading Wiki
Cannot find a cure

on the occasion of that most wonderful waffel

the dutch mafia
escapes to the neatherlands
stroopwafen are joy

On my random inablity to breathe

My lungs are all tight
Did cat sneak into my home?
Coughing woke up Snook

on the occasion of em and sean subscribing me to get these haikus in email

floods my mail [dot] app
i subscribe to RSS!
get leopard. and life.

I think it's time to make a rule

First rule of this blog:
You want to comment? Hear this:
Only in haiku

Celebrating Cesca's new computer, and a puzzle

Cesca and video chat
What a perfect sunday night
Guess where I'm sitting.

On Sluftie's becoming a member of the blog

I went to grandma's
No internet there. Come home.
Read blog. What happened??

on the occasion of dorkage

sluftie's a big dork
cause turkey day's no excuse
but ya'll love sluftie

on the occasion of telling my mom i could rebuild her site by thanksgiving.

nine four three at night.
nothing to do but build site.
starting such a fight.

on the occasion of all these posts going to sean's phone (i think)

wish i had a topic
but really just want to see
how long 'til sean cracks.

on the occasion of continuing firefox buggery

remove tags. restart.
still firefox 3 you taunt me.
i love your scrolling.

on the occasion of cesca being cesca with a new computer.

she won't stay online!
'cuz she can't eat near her mac.
(not a one-napkin...).

on the occasion of being in delaware with little (that I want) to do

cesca sent invite.
she says sean gets text each post.
i will post. all night.

on the occasion of emily drinking the safari kool-aid

firefox fizzles - niiiiice
call chris! safari craps but
steve won't take my call.

On the black Friday birthday/christmas gift purchase

new mac with leopard

but still using the ibook

what am I thinking

on the occasion of new macness

cesca's a Luddite
we'll see when bonus time comes
sean's macbook time?

on the ocassion of firefox problems

asshole not iTard
Go stand in line somewhere else
then use safari

On the ocasion of dinner decisions

looking through zagats
Every page has an option
Where o where to eat?

ok the occasion on the little red book

collect chairman mao
buy others at flea markets
complete collection?

on the occasion of giving thanks

turkey overload
I say its time for a change
not a mexi-can't

On Sean's cologne du jour.

Oh my Snooker, he
smells like cippolinis. Its
kind of my fault. Whoops.

On (in)sanity at work

Pandora online
drowns out the crazy. Music
in my ears instead.

I'm still sad :(

Cesca in New York
But not to see us. So drowned
sorrow in ramen

A thrilling Friday night, so far

Sitting home alone
cold and bundled on the couch
guess who's working late?

on the occasion of cesca in the city

blackmail for cesca
how its made will go by bye
unless she shows up

On Cesca's visit to New York this weekend

Cesca in New York
To see Ari and Joan
Not Em and the Snook.

on the occasion of how its made...

Saved on our tivo
Lighting gels on how its made
Should i copy it?

Why Cesca loves me

Why Cesca loves Em:
Big boobs, and hair, but no crack
and the winking thing

On taking up knitting again

learned to knit again
look like granny while on T
knit, knit, purl, purl, knit

On waiting for cat scans

Waiting for cat scan
filling up on Barium shakes
How will they digest?

Barium milkshake
your flavor does not fool me
you taste like cold chalk

On allergy testing

skin test just to see
the obvious, that I am
allergic to cats

allergies not nice
in order, dust mites, cats, dogs,
make me sneeze, cough, wheeze

On taking your boots off at a kid's birthday party

Went to put on boots,
Same color, look, but not mine
Swapped by busy mom

On being an irrational bitch in the middle of the night last night

My sushi lunch: good
My night's sleep and PMS:
Bad. Sorry Snooker.

On grad school sucking monkey balls

Registering sucks
Who's my advisor? Dunno.
I miss Ernest Benz

on Friday afternoon ennui

It's raining, pouring
The old man is snoring. I
would like to be, too.

On being a lazyass

I am so thirsty
But too lazy to refill
my nalgene. Porkchop.

Tasty yogurt treat

sheep's milk yogurt, yum!
bounty of ginger goodness
creamy with spice crunch

On 9am denist appointment

it's almost lunch time,
but cheek is numb and tingly
one cavity filled

Woo! Now I won't freeze!

I got a new coat
No more colds for me. Pretty:
red with white flowers

I thought I was getting ahead of the game

"Age reverse" lotion
Put it on, and so it was
got acne again

We've been poets for years, really.

We now take a break from our regularly scheduled haiku for some historic poetry of a different form:

Cesca's 5th Grade limerick -

There once was a lady in blue
who could not bow tie her own shoe
she tied such a knot
the medics were brought
and now she's a big ball of blue.

She promises that there are accompanying illustrations, and perhaps one day we'll be lucky enough to see them!

Emily's 6th Grade Limerick -

There once was a lady from France
Who had some very fine pants
They came up to her knees
And let in the breeze,
Oh my how the young men did glance!

There were no illustrations accompanying mine, but the looks on the faces of my classmates was priceless, as I recall.

On snack time

Black and white cookie
Nectar of the gods? Hell yes.
Eat the middle last.

On the occasion of a good ankle prognosis

Woo! Ankle doc says:
You're getting better quickly
Buy more orthotics.

I'll clean them as soon as I stop feeling like there's someone sitting on me, bitch

Went to the doctor
Lungs okay, ears so clogged
Told me to clean them

On Emily's abundance of snot

distance between us
from sneezing, mucus and phlegm
get better soon em

On the lack of posts..... (Boston edition)

grant due tomorrow
work requests eating my time
be back on Wednesday

On the lack of posts...

My stuffy nose runs
It's so hard to concentrate
On writing haiku

On the occasion of a psycho death cold

Chicken soup is best
A nice healthy dose of schmaltz
for fighting a cold

On Tape QC & Halloween

QCing our tapes
So bored, I feel like dying
Boo! Scared in the libes.

Who's the biggest itard? ME!

in line for Leopard
line goes straight out the mall door
6! Apple Open!

21st century ennui

At the Apple store
Waiting in line. I'm hungry
Eating late tonight.

An ode to our favorite bar

At the Slipper Room
So many pretty ladies
I can see their boobs

Oldies, but goodies - cross-posted from RedRightAnkles

I have bedbugs. So itchy.
Call them marauders.
My arm itches. I hate bugs.


So much to do. Marauders
make life difficult.
Clean out closet, vacuum shoes.


Exterminator in mi
casa manana.
Will marauders die? I hope so.

(No, they didn't come back)

Upon the re-consideration of housing options

fine living for me.
the pook wants a door. not hole.
yurts the way to go

Upon the occasion of luff.

sean is the cutest,
I like to snuggle him; I
kiss him good morning


pook, yes a cutie
sweet as can be, but chewy too
a million kisses

"What's Up"

heard "what's up" in car
em forever linked to song
awful, yet so good

Jiggly bits

At Getty Center
stairs are so short, like Seelye
don't jiggle your bits

-Emily

What happens when you start a haiku blog....

the pressure to post
few ideas seem to flow, grow
oh haiku muse, stir!

Fridays

fridays at my job
counting the minutes till home
wish I worked from home

Conference Call Ennui

dumbass conference call
Why do we talk about cake?
What a waste of time!

The everyday haiku

Cesca:
Dunkies warms my hand
Homework ready to hand in
Class will soon begin

10/8

The things you think when on the Lucky Star bus...

Cesca:
Crab Rangoon, kiwi,
Pepper shrimp, friend banana
Century Buffet

Emily:
Century buffet
Overflowing bounty. Good
Dinner of champions

Cesca:
Back on bus, food good
To sleep until we arrive
Would make this great ride

Cesca:
Thanks for the boobies,
Also the piercing and fries
Great Saturday night

Sean:
Em’s too tired to type
Rhyming kicks it up a notch
Emril’s a douche bag

Cesca:
I will stop as well
Dramamine make me sleepy
Little left to tell

Sean:
Had a great weekend.
Hope you did too. Good night now
See you in two weeks.

9/30

Who hasn't been here (unless you're a boy, of course...)

Gyno tomorrow
Old doctor retired. Sad.
New face in my vag.

-Emily, 10/30/2006

The never ending quest to get me to NYC

Sean:
move to the city
mallomars are so tasty
only get them here.

Sean:
Gorillas say rowrr
Cuddle them at the Bronx zoo
Move to new york please

Cesca:
Boston is still home
But New York is soon to come
Sunday I’ll be there

Sean:
Today’s real nice, but
We’re in New Rochelle till late
See you after nine

Cesca:
Plan not for tonight
Sunday next is when I’ll come
Visiting grad school

Em:
Omg yaya!
Yayayayayayaya
Yayayayaya!!!!!!!!

Sean:
Why only Sunday?
Come play all weekend! Snuggle!
Em wants to spoon you

-9/23

On the occasion of Cesca's 25th birthday

Cesca:
twenty-five so soon
can't wait to party with you
enjoy end of youth

Emily:
cackle loud at work
haikus by you are so good
you're an old fart now

Sean:
bones weary. so tired.
its almost time for depends.
fallen. cant get up.

Sean:
perhaps text too small
going to get bifocals?
granny glasses time!

Sean:
cell phones newfangled
texting for whippersnappers
time to drink prune juice

Sean:
now a golden girl.
thank you for being a friend
how bout that blanche, eh?

Sean:
boozing for birthday
nursing homes look for victims
do not get shanghi'ed

Sean:
watching my stories
do not inturrupt, or else
youth has no respect

Sean:
turn that music down
im having the early bird
nothin's better than a deal

Sean:
choose walker or cane?
tough decisions make me tired
narcolepsy, eh?

Sean:
hit you with my purse
dont even try to talk back
vote republican

Sean:
plastic covered couch
so sticky in the summer
but cant get a stain

Sean:
come here kitty cat
cat lady is so crazy
twenty and counting

Cesca:
haiku a minute
em and sean are quite obsessed
makes me love them lots

Emily:
You bitch. Off from work
Search for meat packing broll
want to eat lunch now.

Cesca:
with age comes wisdom
youth knows only of the now
tell sean he's naive

Emily:
Now an old woman
Wrinkles now soon to follow
Need a walker yet?

On the occassion of Emily & Sean's trip to Los Angeles...

Cesca:
crossing the country
emily and sean do go
for fun and wedding

Emily:
Have my babies now
Vows said in haiku format
babies speak haiku

Cesca:
hope you have much fun
but no dance say Koreans
ride disney instead

Emily:
Call me Cher Hor'witz
Drive my Jeep to Disney Land
I tot'ly paused!

Cesca:
cesca em babies
ahhh, lighting librarians
so cute, makes me puke

Emily:
we should publish these.
we should start a blog, perhaps
we would get readers

And now you know how we got here.

hahahhaha YES!!!!

Ok, now we have to find all the haikus we've written them and put them here...